The Celebrific Lowdown

TMZ:   Who knew?  Angelina Jolie & brother James Haven consider themselves orphans 

Us Weekly:  Why Halle Berry is so mad at Parade magazine & for good reason we think! 

PopSugar:   The Reese Witherspoon & family Easter Sunday outing, adorable! 

PEOPLE:   The eldest Hanson, Isaac, & his wife welcome their first child

Page Six:  Porn queen Jenna Jameson losing fans & weight all over the damn place

Glitterati Gossip:  Ha!  A naked Tom Brady wishes us a very happy Easter weekend!

City Rag:  Celebs are just like us!  They eat too!!!

I’m Not Obsessed:   You sillybilly, Courteney Cox tries & fails to hide behind her ginormous bag

Just Jared:  A truly awesome Ocean’s 13 movie trailer sure to set your Monday out on a good foot

Pop Candy:  The best of the best of last week

Celebitchy:  Everyone has a band these days, including old man Kevin Costner 

TMZ:  Good ole Britney Crazypants Spears may be in a bad & long deal with manager 

HollyScoop:  Brody Jenner never rocks & that’s all there is to it  

Gawker:   Ever wanna see Sam Talbot in a banana hammock?  Yeah, me neither. 

Socialite’s Life:  Porn star Ron Jeremy goes on a boob-grabbing rampage 

Life & Style:  Just how can you get Mischa Barton’s look? 

PEOPLE:   The scoop on Anna Nicole Smith’s diaries of drugs, food & more drugs 

Us Weekly:  I think I see a new reality show idea, Paris Hilton:  In Chains 

PopSugar:   You know, just when does Justin Timberlake stop running his overworked mouth?

Celebrity Smack:   Kate Moss should NEVER go anywhere without her trusty makeup 

Celebitchy:   Britney Spears now knows how to pee in the woods, thanks to rehab 

TMZ:   John Travolta makes an emergency landing in Ireland & the residents have regretted it ever since 

HollyScoop:  None other than Kate Moss hangs from chandelier

Gawker:  So, who is on Paris Hilton patrol again? 

Socialite’s Life:   It just can’t be helped, Angelina Jolie’s brother James Haven is a big oddity 

Life & Style:   So, who is this CariDee I keep hearing about?

PEOPLE:  Ahhh, Britney Spears & her many covering-up-the-baldness hats

Us Weekly:  Mario Lopez looks like a hunky, headbanded fairy, does he not? 

PopSugar:  WTF?  Brought to you the only way Lindsay Lohan knows how…  

Celebrity Smack:  Keith Richards is a snorting machine, but then, what else is new?  

Celebitchy:  And Lindsay Lohan continues to get her party on, no matter if it annoys everyone in the vicinity 

TMZ:   Does anyone still remember Duran Duran?  Well, some guy’s been robbed if you care. 

HollyScoop:   Victoria Posh Beckham’s reality show to be axed?  No!  My life has no meaning anymore!!!! 

Gawker:  And here we have it, we all love Alanis Morissette again

Socialite’s Life:   Sienna Miller continues to amaze us in the fashion department 

Life & Style:  More on that Angelina Jolie, Brad Pitt & newly adopted Vietnamese son Pax kidnapping thing 

PEOPLE:  Music producers are good liars, producer says everything is “coming together” for new Britney Spears album.  Yeah, right! 

Us Weekly:  Kevin Federline getting screwed with Britney Spears divorce settlement, hahahahahaha!  

PopSugar:  A very awwwww moment with Ben Affleck, Jennifer Garner & baby Violet 

Celebrity Smack:   I don’t care if it’s skinner, Courtney Love will never attain hotness 

Celebitchy:  Woody Harrelson’s dad was a hitman, and a hot one at that!

TMZ:  A shady encounter with the Olsen twins

HollyScoop:  Who wore the little black number better, Lindsay Lohan or Claudia Schiffer?

Gawker:  Orlando Bloom recently spotted, looking hot as usual

Socialite’s Life:  K-Fed probably getting only about $1 million from Britney Spears divorce settlement

Life & Style:  Guess who’s finally speaking out about wanting a baby?  Halle Berry!

PEOPLE:  Terri Irwin opens up about the hard life without Steve by her side

Us Weekly:   Are you respecting Heather Mills a little more these days?

PopSugar:  Wow!  Kate Hudson & blondie Owen Wilson dined at the Ivy together!

Celebrity Smack:  Jenna Jameson not so happy with the down under area, thanks to surgery gone wrong