Kristin Chenoweth

It’s no secret that I love Kristin Chenowerth, but man this photo shows those giant veins in her forehead that make me wonder what is going on there. Alien? Reptile? But she is sexy and cute and fun and awesome. This is tough.

I’m already on the next paragraph and I’ve forgotten what is supposed to be tough. Tough that I don’t know if I like her or not? Not really because I do. Man, I miss my girlfriend. Okay, I don’t have a girlfriend, but if I did I would miss her right now and I think that makes me a very romantic person.

Why am I still single? Maybe because I have a problem with getting it up for women that have veiny foreheads. Somehow I need to correct this. Stat.

Is there anything hotter than a 41-year old blonde midget that kind of looks reptilian? I think not! Kristin Chenoweth was on Glee this season and is the only reason I know about her. Yeah I watch Glee and I know you watch it as well. It is a good show so don’t pretend that only the lonely watch it.

Oh man that sounded awesome, let me say it again. Only the lonely. I am going to print t-shirts with that saying and wear it to my Glee audition and I will be known as the Only the Lonely guy and become super famous. I will go out to dinner with beautiful women and each time they ask me what my middle name is I will simply respond with “the.” Man, that is so pimp.

Then I will run around Oz with Kristin and we can have happy munchkin babies together, but we won’t let them play with Alyssa Milano’s munchkin babies because they are excessively hairy and our children don’t wear fur. We are staunch PETA activists.

In all seriousness, I would give her a hug and she would love it. Get some face Kristin, get some face.