Robert Pattinson

Robert Pattinson named world’s sexiest man…again
No surprise here: Robert Pattinson of Twilight fame topped Glamour Magazine’s poll for the 50 Sexiest Men in the World. (Other names in the top five: Johnny Depp, David Beckhan, Zac Efron, and Twilight co-star Taylor Lautner.)

Why, why, why?

Robert Pattison seems like a great guy, but we know that he and Taylor Lautner only got in because of their roles in the Twilight saga. And, FYI, their characters like to drink blood and tend to howl at the moon. And sometimes glitter like Christmas balls under the sun.

At least Johnny Depp’s character (though grungy and with bad teeth) was a swashbuckling hero who could cut through a crowd of enemies with an expert swing of the blade. That takes skill, you know? And David Beckham plays soccer, and Zac Efron sang and danced his way to people’s hearts via High School Musical.
What does Twilight character Edward do? Brood? But ah, we forget, he broods in a sexy and soul-searching way. Because we all know that what women really want are “intense” men, even if they aren’t technically human, and quite possibly have commitment issues, and still live with their family after 500 years.