You think the headline was cheesy? Please, I have done cheesier stuff to win the affection of Ms. Wilde. I once dressed up as a giant donut outside of her house and sang Wild Thing. Why? The donut was a big ‘O’ and represented Olivia and of course the song was about her. It was a perfect analogy of our love and like the donut, our love was quickly gobbled up by a fatty.
Who was the fatty? Imagination. Imagination isn’t a fatty you say? Well it was simply my imagination that I did these things to win her over and when I realized it was not a reality it got gobbled up into thin air.
You see how that works?
Yeah so um she is hot in an alien looking way. I’m not sure if her head is growing and is about to explode or she had some surgery to make her look cartoonish. It is a hot type of cartoonish though so it is all good.
Sorry, I lost $10,000 on the Colts yesterday so I am paying small New Zealanders to write for me.
