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Celebrific

Tracking Celebrities in Their Native Habitat

Rachel

Jessica blames Dad for bad career?

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Jessica may be ready to fire her dad, Joe Simpson — thank God. He’s a lousy manager, and stupid decisions have derailed what should’ve been a really strong career. “After The Dukes of Hazzard movie, Joe was telling everyone that Jess was the next Julia Roberts,” said one insider. “The public bought it for a while, but the studios never believed it. Now there isn’t much work for Jessica.”

In fact, most of the acting work that Jessica gets is for small self-funded films with pretty abysmal salaries. Time to dust off that Rolodex, girl, and look for a manager who actually knows what he’s doing.

Britney’s troubled childhood, exposed

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Aaaah, now we get her. Us Weekly magazine revealed a disturbing picture of Britney Spears’ childhood, told by her former lawyer Eric Ervin. Apparently, the “wholesome” image portrayed at the peak of her career was pure PR. (No surprise there.) Not only did she lose her virginity at 14 years old, but Justin got a piece of the action from the start.

But Britney didn’t exactly have any strong role models — or a stable family structure. Her grandmother, Emma Jean Spears, commited suicide by shooting herself at the grave of her infant son, who had died nearly a decade earlier. Her other children, including Britney’s Dad Jamie, were in elementary school. (His brothers eventually became homeless.)

The story actually helps the public understand why Britney’s so screwed up. Somebody help her. And (for once) we mean that in the nicest possible way.

Britney’s troubled childhood, exposed

by

celebrific-us-weekly-nov-20.jpg

Aaaah, now we get her. Us Weekly magazine revealed a disturbing picture of Britney Spears’ childhood, told by her former lawyer Eric Ervin. Apparently, the “wholesome” image portrayed at the peak of her career was pure PR. (No surprise there.) Not only did she lose her virginity at 14 years old, but Justin got a piece of the action from the start.

But Britney didn’t exactly have any strong role models — or a stable family structure. Her grandmother, Emma Jean Spears, commited suicide by shooting herself at the grave of her infant son, who had died nearly a decade earlier. Her other children, including Britney’s Dad Jamie, were in elementary school. (His brothers eventually became homeless.)

The story actually helps the public understand why Britney’s so screwed up. Somebody help her. And (for once) we mean that in the nicest possible way.

Nicole Kidman confronts stalkarazzi

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Nicole Kidman testified against the “stalkarazzi” that nearly gave her a nervous breakdown. The actres told the New South Wales Supreme Court that Jamie Fawcett tailed her while she was driving to dinner at her parents. His “questionable driving manouvers” reduced her to tears and a cold panic. He also followed her on her Tahiti honeymoon with Keith Urban. Now, she won’t go out without security, and feels “I don’t feel equipped to handle things.”

Hey, Jamie, leave the poor girl alone.

Jeepers, she tried to kill me!

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Bill Nye

Talk about dangerous science. Bill Nye — known as tv’s Science Guy — has accused his former fiancee, Blair Tindal, of trying to poisoning him.

Nye has also slapped a restraining order (she’s lucky that’s all she gets) against her. She can’t contact him, visit his home or studio, and presumably, go anywhere near his food.

Nye had caught her “in the act” of killing his plants. “She was dressed in black, and emerged from my backyard carrying two plastic bottles of solvent. Apparently she was trying to poison my plants including some vegetable(s). She fled on foot and then a car sped away from the scene,” said the legal documents.” A few days later, she left a coffee pot on his porch. We guess it wasn’t a peace offering.