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Celebrific

Tracking Celebrities in Their Native Habitat

MrAlmostWrong

Summer Glau In Glasses

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Summer Glau in glasses dollhouse

Unfortunately for Joss Whedon, he has an uncanny ability for creating shows that get shutdown pretty quickly. They are always good, they are always on Fox and they are always shutdown. This time it was Dollhouse and although the show started off slowly it picked up pretty well and it had Elisa Duzkukuadusface, so there was a hot chick protagonist. A surefire formula for success if there ever was one right?

In the second and final season, Summer Glau was making a cameo and to many geeks she is the wet dream incarnate. Here she is wearing glasses which just made her go through the geek boner roof. This isn’t gossip. This isn’t news. But it is something that many people around the world have been waiting for.

Here at Celebrific, we aim serve the needs of all our audience, whether they are blind, deaf, dumb or geeks. Yes, those are the only people we seem to attract here.

Stayed tuned tomorrow for naked Oprah Winfrey pics that will be sure to please the blind crowd.

Here she is doing a Bugs Bunny impression. How cute.

Summer Glau Dollhouse

Pamela Anderson is trashy

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There are moments where I didn’t want to believe, but the writing has been on the wall forever. You figured sooner or later she wouldn’t be able to recover simply due to old age and she would have to change her habits, but what were the chances of that ever happening? As you can see, they weren’t very good.

Pamela Anderson is trashy

You have to remember that this woman has kids. One day her kids are going to be old enough where they find their friends are touching themselves to their mom. She is 42 years old! This isn’t a spring chicken we are talking about here. We are talking about a woman that puts teenagers to shame with the way she dresses. Ashley Greene doesn’t even pull stunts like this so you have to question this woman’s sanity. Being known as a sex symbol has gotten to her head because she still wants to think she is that sex symbol.

Courtney Cox is older, hotter and classier than Pamela. When did the world ever see that one coming? I certainly didn’t. In the 90s when Baywatch and Friends were around, someone made a bet at a bar that Courtney would end up being 10x hotter than Pamela in their 40s and this person got laughed at, but now is a very rich individual.

I was almost that man, but I was simply too young to be at a bar. I told my homeless friend to go in and make the bet, but who trusts someone walking around with a pickle jar filled with urine? Nobody is the correct answer to that question.

Sarah Harding is the Bikini Babe of the Day

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This is where you call me a geek, but the sexiest thing about the picture below is that she is reading a book or at the very least pretending to read a book. How many women with a body like this do you find reading a book at the beach? Almost zero and therefore this makes her a keeper. Excuse me while I go and do some research about who she actually is to make sure she isn’t related to Tanya Harding. Stare at this picture until I get back.

Sarah Harding

Okay it seems she is a member of the British pop group Girls Aloud which means she is mostly harmless. Eventually she will break up with the group and try a solo album that will fail miserably and then in 10 years find herself doing a reunion tour with the group. I don’t mind any of this because at least you know what you are getting into. With actresses you never know which path they are going to take or if it is even the right one. You might find yourself with the next Leelee Sobieski and what do you do after that? Slit your wrists?

Wait, I just thought of something. This is actually kind of fishy because what popstar do you know reads books at any place or any time of the day? I think this is a coverup for something else and the hairs on my butt are standing on end with distrust. I guess it was fun while it lasted Sarah, but I have to call it quits. Maybe in another lifetime we can make it work.

Ashley Greene is back to save mankind

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Ashley Greene

Yesterday I spoke about Ashley Greene dressing plain and causing a revolution that might cause violence to spread across the globe. I was truly worried for the existence of mankind and was already making plans for a new bunker under my house. Thankfully, Ashley has come to her senses and released a new set of pics that show she still has a little bit of style, albeit strange as hell.

Again, I’m not sure what is going on with these pictures, but they are definitely better than the one we saw yesterday which honestly isn’t that hard to beat. I truly believe she read my words and thought long and hard about her actions and I don’t think we will be seeing her in such an outfit again for a very long time. In my own way I just saved the world from total disaster so there should be a parade thrown for me.

I don’t want any marching bands in the parade though. They take up too much space and play music that nobody really cares about. Instead, all I want are those giant balloons you see in the Macy’s Thanksgiving Parade. I mean at least 100 of them because those are what people come to see at a parade. I don’t want to ride on a float, I want to ride Garfield.

That is how I am going to do a parade and it will be popular because as you can see it is fun. I’m betting you would even pay to come watch my parade because you have nothing better to do that day. The first pay to watch parade in existence and it is all because of Ashley Greene. I probably owe her lunch for this or something.

Nah.

Ashley Greene Going Plain As Well, Ugh

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63121_Ashley_Greene_Game_Day_at_the_Playboy_Mansion-001_122_434lo.jpg

First it was Jessica Biel and now it’s Ashley Greene. I have never seen her take a photograph with this many clothes on or clothing this plain. I am confused by this trend and hope that it stops really soon. I know some people may be trying to change their image a bit, but this is simply taking it too far. If I have to start getting naked myself in public to change things up then I will do it. I just need a bit of warning ahead of time so I can get my body in shape. You don’t want a 300lb jalopy running around town telling everyone else that they need to get naked like them.

Could you imagine how bad Ashley would feel if this became true? She would be the cause of a revolution that would spark violence worldwide. If you didn’t know, violence is a very bad thing and to have someone spark it simply by wearing jeans would be outrageous. If you are going to spark some violence then have the Kansas City Royals win the World Series or something.

I’m getting upset thinking about this. I need to get into contact with her immediately to make sure that this was nothing more than a fluke. You can’t be young and sexy and expect not to show a little bit of skin. It’s not as if it is cold and she is dressing warm. She is dressing as though she is going to the mall on a Sunday. Absurd to the bird if you know the word without the turd. You heard?

And that folks is how I end this day. Don’t question the method, but explore the greatness and reset your mind.