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Celebrific

Tracking Celebrities in Their Native Habitat

MrAlmostWrong

Hwang Mi Hee is the International Hotties of the Day

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Hwang Mi Hee

As I promised before, I am bringing you a new hottie that you probably didn’t know about today. This is the gorgeous Hwang Mi Hee. She is such an unknown she doesn’t even have a Wikipedia page yet, so maybe I will the person that springboards her career to new heights. I have done it before with such people as Gary Busey, Roseanne and most recently JC Chavez. That is what I specialize in, my ability to create stars. You see stars aren’t born they are created, however you have to find the people that are willing to be created.

If you can pull off a giant fake furry hand and still look cute then you have the potential to be made. Hwang showcases this ability and therefore I am making myself her client. No more car, anime, or manga events for her. No sir, we are going global and doing shampoo ads now. That is how you start to get big. If you don’t believe me, pay attention to whatever actor is in the next shampoo ad that you see and you will recognize them 10 years later s

Doutzen Kroes Throws Her Name Into The Hat…

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Doutzen Kroes

Tired of me only mentioning Bar Refaeli and Miranda Kerr, Doutzen personally emailed me and said that she wanted me to throw her name into the hat for Celebrific model of the year for 2010 and she sent along these photos. I must admit she makes a compelling case and I would be remiss not to put her name into the hat. That gives us three competitors so far this year and it is only January so I am looking forward to seeing who else decides to jump into the ring.

However, this brings up the question of how she even got my email? I try to keep it private so these celebrity stalkers don’t bother me. They tend to pressure me into saying nice things about them because they can’t handle the negative press, but that just isn’t my style. I like to bring the real to my people and the real is usually negative. It’s a bad point of view to have you might think, but I didn’t make this world, I just control it. Egotistical? Quite possibly, but that is how you survive in this cutthroat world filled with actors, singers and models.

You can’t let them push you around because once they know they can they don’t stop. I only put Doutzen into the hat because she asked nicely and complimented me on my new haircut. Wait?! How did she know I got a new haircut?! Time to go back into the bunker, things are getting weird.

Evangeline Lilly Part II

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Evangeline Lilly is Hot

I was a little unforgiving last time I spoke about Evangeline, but it wasn’t because of her looks. Her looks are at least a 7 on a scale of 50. I’m joking, she is a very attractive lady. However, maybe the last photo set just didn’t do her justice because I couldn’t even come up with a work of fiction entertaining enough to put down on this site for her.

This weekend I set out on a quest though to make things right. I had to find some photos that presented Ms. Lilly in the attractive light that so many fanboys shine upon her and I think I did a good job of coming up with these. You see, she doesn’t need to be in a bikini or lingerie to be sexy. She is able to present her beauty in a whole new light by sometimes wearing guy outfits and reminding the world that she could probably kick the crap out of you if she so wanted. To some that is sexy. to me that is scary as hell, but whatever floats your boat works for me.

For any Lost fans out there, help me out with this one. Does she bounce around the island getting her tail on or is she restricted to just two guys? It seems like every guy would be after this one on the island, but I don’t know the story. Maybe they all have sex with the polar bear and that is the end of the discussion. Nobody ends a discussion with polar bear sex quite like I do. One of a kind.

The Olivia Wilde Blonde Collection

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Olivia Wilde Blonde

For the most part women can pull of the hair changing color thing, but sometimes they just don’t pull it off well enough. Some women were just not meant to be blondes and Olivia Wilde is one of them. If you look at the set of photos from the last the last time I spoke about her you can see that she is a dark-haired kind of chick. She has that sultry, exotic, and seductive thing going that just doesn’t work well with blondes. Blondes have a different type of aura that they present and Olivia doesn’t have it.

That isn’t a knock against blondes or Olivia, but it definitely is a compatibility issue. I’m not sure if she changed it for a role, was born with it or what, but she should never go back. I don’t care if she surrounds herself with jealous friends that wish only for her downfall, this is a far worse fate because it hide her alien beauty. She doesn’t have human beauty. I just won’t admit it because every time I see her part of my brain is telling me that there is something seriously wrong with her head and her eyes and there is another part saying that is what makes her sexy.

As you can understand that isn’t human so it must be alien because they are the closest creatures to humans. Animals stand no chance against aliens and therefore I must compare others to aliens. End of story.

Alyson Hannigan Won the Pie

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Alyson Hannigan

Earlier, I talked about Lacey Chabert being the middle mean girls. Now we are on the topic of Alyson Hannigan and when you first saw American Pie, did you think for one second that of all the people in that movie she would end up being the most famous and having the greatest acting career? I sure as hell didn’t, but lo and behold here we are. She blossomed very well and is the star of How I Met Your Mother, which I’ve seen before and isn’t that bad of a show.

Did I mention she is hot, but not in an impossible to get kind of way. I’m talking about a I have a shot with this chick kind of way. This in turn makes her even hotter. Interesting how that works. Other women that fall into this category include Halle Berry, Eliza Dushku and Amanda Bynes. Yes, I can get with all of them.

There is no reason to hate on me. Envy me if you wish, but hatred is a very bad thing. Anyways, she even has the weird smile and teeth going that add to her cuteness. Too many people in Hollywood strive for perfection when they really should be striving to accentuate the flaws. It will work out better for them.

I refuse to get these 10 missing teeth replaced and it has worked wonders for my image. Now, nobody messes with me when I go into a drunken rage.